16 August 2005

Job is still fabulous. Okay. That summary is out of the way. Now on to the staggeringly bad news.

A friend of mine has been battling breast cancer for just over a year now (I think that's the timeline?? Seems longer...)
Anyway, she was diagnosed last summer, went through radiation, then chemo and was said to be cancer free by Thanksgiving.
Early this spring she was diagnosed again. She had a mastectomy and then started chemo. Chemo is generally 3 weeks on, one week off. She was doing this for quite a while with two different drugs at a time (on staggered schedules), since she could feel growth anytime she wasn't receiving chemo. This way she was constantly on some form of chemo.
About 6 weeks or so ago, they decided that the chemo was getting too rough (she was having problems breathing and such), without substantial positive effects (the cancer was still growing and spreading).
I talked to her husband at the end of last week and this week she is having hospice come to the house for pain management. Based on similar cases, people in the know have told them she has probably between a week and a month to live. She's awake for maybe a couple hours a day at this point, and often doesn't remember much then, from the doses of morphine she's on.

I'm not taking it well. I'm crying myself to sleep, and back awake again. I sometimes randomly start crying during the day. I'm afraid to call again and see what's up, and afraid not to. I know he'll let me know when it's no longer my decision to make.

Hug those you love today.

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